Philly’s Brotherly Love Discovered in Ruins of Boyd Theater

After being lost for 44 years, Philadelphia’s Brotherly Love has at last been uncovered.

Demolition crews at the site of the Boyd Theater contacted city officials Monday morning when something strange caught their eyes in the basement. Bob Bejar of Port Richmond was one of the first to notice it. “I’ve been working in structural demo for about 10 years now, but I’ve never seen anything like this,” he said.

A few hours later, historians at Temple University concluded that it was, indeed, the lost Brotherly Love.

The Brotherly Love was solemnly passed on from mayor to mayor since Philadelphia’s founding in 1682. Somewhere around 1972 Mayor Frank Rizzo misplaced the Brotherly Love.

“It’s encouraging that we were able to find it,” added Bejar, “because I was beginning to think it never existed in the first place. My friends have started calling Philly the ‘City of Brotherly Hate’.”

Exciting as it is to have the Brotherly Love recovered, experts said that it has been destroyed beyond all repair.