Drexel Music Industry Program to be Renamed !#*

Starting next year, Drexel University will be going through some interesting rebranding. Its popular music industry program will be renamed !#* (that is no typo: an exclamation point, an octothorpe, and an asterisk).

Drexel’s Jim Klein, program director of the music industry program, explains that the university is always trying to stay on the cutting edge. “The current trend in the music industry is to be small, obscure, and exclusive. Our program has become way too mainstream in the past few years, and we needed a way to really confuse the shit out of perspective students.”

“Drexel is all about innovation,” adds Drexel’s president, John A. Fry. “We also strive to create an environment that prepares students for the work environment they’ll face upon graduation.”

Klein says they settled on this name due to the long history of unpronounceable and un-Googleable band names. “The past few decades have seen , !!!,  GL▲SS †33†H, among many others, as well as some album names like /\/\ /\ Y /\ and ℑ⊇◊⊆ℜ and song titles like ‘† River †’ and ‘≈Ω≈Ω≈Ω≈Ω≈Ω≈Ω≈Ω≈Ω≈’. We’re just following the trend!”

The three symbols that Drexel has chosen signify the core goal of the program. Kelin explains, “First, you are struck with inspiration, that’s the exclamation point. Then you pound out the idea. And then you become a star. All summed up in three characters.”

When asked how the name will be pronounced, Klein uttered some combination of an alveolar click followed by two distinct tones which cannot be accurately transcribed in this article.