The 9 Cats That Belong to People You Date in Your 20’s

1. The Domesticated Dimwit

You laugh at how your girlfriend’s cat runs into walls and how he’s afraid of bugs, but when she just stops answering your texts one day, you’re glad he doesn’t have the memory capacity to miss you.

2. The Heavy Sleeper

Your boyfriend claims to have a cat, but you’ve never actually seen it. It’s always sleeping, he says. He turns out to be a pathological liar.

3. The Feline Princess

The little tiara is cute at first, until you realize that this cat is so pampered by your significant other that it causes you to suddenly wake up in a cold sweat one night, realizing that if you two ever had kids, your children would be grade-A spoiled brats.

4. The Cross-eyed Kitty

Whenever you walk in the door, he looks up at you with the adorable little face, but it isn’t long before your girlfriend realizes that you’re only dating her to play with her kitty, and she sends the poor cat off to live with her stepmother in Florida.

5. The Roommate’s Cat

Despite who actually takes the time to clean her litter box, she technically belongs to your significant other’s roommate. When the roommate threatens to move out, you inevitably find yourself an accessory to first degree cat kidnapping.

6. The Scrawny Stray

Your boyfriend is so tender and caring that he brought a poor little stray cat into his home. But one day when he’s in the bathroom, she puts her little paw on your lap and whispers, “Help me escape.” And you chuckle to yourself, knowing full well that you’ll have nightmares for the rest of your life.

7. The Loud One

“Is that even legal?” you wonder.

8. Peeping Tomcat

Every single time you have sex, this cat is watching, and you can’t help but wonder whether he’s actually a lonely 40 year old woman with a knack for witchcraft. You find it curiously arousing.

9. The Cuddly Companion

Even as your boyfriend chucks your belongings out the second-story window, and you’re sobbing to the point of dehydration, this cute little guy is wrapped around your leg, giving you the affection no human ever will.